So – like – ya I recently found this old lamp at an abandoned garage sale which was kind of weird.
Anyway once I got it home and started polishing it POOF to my surprise out popped a genie.
True story…
Further weirdness ensued when the genie revealed himself to be Diggity’s twin brother. However, this dog wore his mustard on the opposite side…
In a shocked tone I yelled “Diggity – you’re moonlighting as a genie? No money cheating at Pork Races?” The genie replied angrily, “If you want these wishes don’t ever call me by that wiener’s name! My name is Doggity – that knucklehead’s my cousin – twice fried!”
I figured I better start wishin’ before Doggity went missin’.
So I said “Hey Diggity… Doggity… Genie Wienie whatever your name is… How about some really cool seats and concessions and ‘facilities’ and premium seating in the outfield all in a scaled down version of Wrigley Field’s ‘rooftops’?” Twas my first wish…
I muttered… construct it somewhere over or near the “batters eye” and name it Thompson Alley. The Noise Nation Bleachers would also be acceptable. The Genie scoffed…
For the next wish and I even showed him a pic so he wouldn’t muck it up – a fancy new LCD video scoreboard.
To go with that Mr. Doggity genie a “ribbon board” all the way around the concourse.
Since we’re redecorating how ’bout throwing in a couple outfield video walls there genie.
I spoke quickly as the Genie started to fade – “Genie how about some new home uniforms and an Italian food vendor and Yocco’s and a swimming pool and no parking (unintelligible) ……. POOF he was gone…
I Dream of Dishing









