In this episode we check out what the LV Steelhawks have been up to in the off season and we learn about Roller Derby from our very own Lehigh Valley Rollergirls!
Category Archives: LV Roller Girls
Vast Valley of Sports: Episode 2 “Steelhawks & Roller Derby!”
Filed under LV Roller Girls, NoiseNation TV, Steel Hawks
Look Out for the Quiet Ones…
We’ve been kind of quiet here on the Horn & Bell this week.
Someone once told me that I shouldn’t worry about chatty folks but to “Look out for the quiet ones, they are up to something.”
Well…
We’re up to something!
We’re up to something good!
Ebay has been involved. A seamstress has been involved. Many hours of silence bringing this together, just for you!
It won’t be done overnight and you’ll be the first to witness its debut so stay tuned!
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Hats off to Ethan Martin for his first MLB win today as well as Cody Asche for his first MLB home run!
Oink! Screech! Roll on!
Do You Have What it Takes?
Our very own Lehigh Valley Rollergirls are opening the doors and allowing those who are interested, the chance to be a Lehigh Valley Rollergirl.

For those who dare… click here to begin the journey!
So what exactly does it take to be a Roller Girl?
The Women’s Flat Track Derby Association recently published an update to their skater Minimum Skills Requirements.
I can barely sit on a bench with roller skates on so some of these look nearly impossible in my eyes.
This isn’t the roller derby you remember fondly from Saturday mornings as a kid. There are rules, regulations, referees and a host of folks tracking stats, penalties and scoring.
Taking a look at the requirements needed JUST TO PARTICIPATE:
1.1 Skating posture
1.1.1 Bends at knees and hips with shoulders back.
1.1.2 Demonstrates stability, with center of gravity down and forward.
1.1.3 Demonstrates ability to skate low with bent, flexible knees.1.2 Stride
1.2.1 Uses steady, confident, fluid strides.
1.2.2 Uses both feet to push forward on straightaways.
1.2.3 Shifts weight completely from foot to foot without stumbling.1.3 Crossovers
1.3.1 Performs smooth crossovers while skating straightaways and track turns.
1.3.2 Uses both feet to push during crossovers.
1.3.3 Performs reverse crossovers, crossing over the right foot to the outside of the track.
1.4 Speed and endurance
1.4.1 Skates at least 27 laps around regulation track within five minutes.
1.4.2 Accelerates from a standstill to complete one lap within 13 seconds.1.5 Stops
Skater must come to a complete stop from a brisk pace within 4 seconds, using proper form and without losing balance.1.5.1 T-stop
1.5.1.1 Balancing weight on one leg, other foot is turned at a 90 degree angle so the heel or arch of the turned foot is aligned with the heel of the other foot.
1.5.1.2 Maintaining balance on one leg, applies smooth pressure with the turned foot using the two outside wheels, the two front wheels or all four wheels (does not use only the two inside wheels).1.5.2 Plow stop
1.5.2.1 Turns one or both feet so toes are pointing in and heels are pointing out.
1.5.2.2 Upon completion of stop, feet are in a position that would allow resumed skating (feet are not spread so wide apart skater must adjust stance before resuming skating).1.6 Other skating skills
1.6.1 Performs one-foot glides with each foot for the length of the track turn and straightaway with good balance.
1.6.1.1 In low stance with one foot completely off the floor, able to balance weight over the other foot for at least 5 seconds.
1.6.1.2 Maintains speed sufficient to complete glide and does not flail limbs.
1.6.2 Propels self while keeping all eight wheels on the floor.
1.6.3 Moves easily and fluidly from one side of the track to the other.
1.6.3.1 Performs smooth, quick lateral cuts, crossing the track at least four times on each straightaway and at least three times on each track turn.
1.6.4 Backwards skating within track boundaries.
1.6.4.1 Maintains moderate pace skating backward around the entire track.
Skater must perform the following falls safely, correctly and naturally. Skaters must be able to slide into knee contact with the floor, rather than crashing onto pads. Slides should be performed from a brisk pace without using hands or flailing arms. Recovery to a normal skating pace should be smooth and immediate, unless noted otherwise.2.1 Knee taps
2.1.1 Left
2.1.2 Right
2.1.3 Performs each knee tap without coming to a complete stop.
2.1.4 Taps a single knee without breaking normal skating stride.
2.1.5 Recovers from knee tap without using hands to get up.
2.1.6 Performs two consecutive single knee taps in stride, with low recovery.2.2 Double knee slides
2.2.1 Knees do not make contact with ground at exact same time.
2.2.2 Returns to active skating within three seconds.
2.2.3 Recovers without using hands to get up.
2.2.4 Momentum used to initiate the slide is continued into the recovery to normal skating motion.
Skater must demonstrate the ability to perform the following tasks without losing balance, stumbling or falling.3.1 Standing and stepping from a standstill, maintaining control of wheels (not rolling)
3.1.1 Forward and backward.
3.1.2 Side to side in both directions.
3.1.3 Grapevine (first foot side steps, second foot steps across and in front of first foot, first foot side steps, second foot steps behind and crosses first foot) to both the right and left.
3.1.4 Shuffle (first foot side steps, second foot steps to meet first foot without crossing first foot, first foot immediately side steps in a hopping motion) to both the right and left.
3.1.5 Quick steps (both feet rapidly alternate in small steps, only one foot is on the ground at a time) in place and to the right and left.
3.1.6 Ability to balance on each foot from a stationary position at least 30 seconds.3.2 Hopping
3.2.1 Hops over an object at least 6 inches (15 centimeters) in height without touching the object or losing balance, while skating at a moderate pace.
3.2.2 Jumps with both feet simultaneously, but does not have to land with both feet simultaneously.
3.2.3 Hops laterally at least 18 inches (45.5 centimeters) from a brisk forward speed.3.3 Focus
3.3.1 Comfortably looks left, right, and behind quickly and unexpectedly while maintaining regular skating stride at a moderate pace.3.4 Weaving
3.4.1 Maneuvers through 10 cones, each no more than 5 feet (1.5 meters) apart (not to exceed 50 feet or 15 meters), placed through the straightaways and track turns, in less than 6 seconds
3.4.2 Weaves comfortably and briskly through a moderately moving pack of skaters without focusing on their own feet3.5 Transitions
3.5.1 Turns 180 degrees without breaking stride, maintaining a moderate pace
3.5.1.1 Turns clockwise and counterclockwise from front to back
3.5.1.2 Turns clockwise and counterclockwise from back to front
3.5.2 Turns 360 degrees without breaking stride, from a moderate pace. Using two 180 degree turns in a row, without breaking stride, is acceptable.
Skaters must demonstrate the ability to perform the following skills legally, safely, and without losing balance, stumbling, or falling, while skating at a moderate pace.4.1 Whips
4.1.1 Giving and receiving arm whips.
4.1.1.1 Giving an inside whip, the initiating skater holds their right arm against their body, providing a hand as a “handle” for the receiver to grab and pull. The initiator does not attempt to pull from the shoulder. The initiator may use the left hand to push the receiving skater.
4.1.1.2 Giving outside whip, the initiating skater positions body with one foot extended in front of the other, and extends right arm to receiver. The receiving skater grasps the initiator’s hand with their own right hand. The initiator of the whip, using core abdominal muscles, not the shoulder muscles, pulls the receiver, transferring momentum to the skater being whipped.
4.1.2 Taking and providing hip, belt and clothing whips.
4.1.2.1 Consistently demonstrates the ability, judgment and timing to take a whip off another skater’s body or clothing without pulling the other skater off balance.
4.1.2.2 Consistently demonstrates the stability to provide hip and clothing whips without getting pulled off balance.4.2 Pushes
4.2.1 Giving pushes
4.2.1.1 Pushes receiving skater near receiver’s center of gravity (hips or buttocks) with ample force to provide noticeable change in receiving skater’s direction of momentum.
4.2.1.2 Pushes are centered and even (does not turn receiving skater’s hips).
4.2.1.3 Pushes are parallel to the floor (does not push up, causing the receiver to be pushed off their feet, or down, causing the receiver to be pushed to the floor).
4.2.1.4 Maintains form and balance before, during and after pushing receiving skater.
4.2.2 Receiving pushes
4.2.2.1 Uses momentum provided from a forward push to accelerate and begins skating within two seconds of push.
4.2.2.2 Maintains form and balance while receiving push forward, to left and/or right.4.3 Pacing
4.3.1 Adjusts to the variable speeds (decrease/increase) of a pace line while maintaining an arms-length distance from other skaters without falling, tripping, overtaking or running into another skater.4.4 Weaving around moving obstacles
4.4.1 Demonstrates weaving through a single-file line of skaters, each an arm’s length apart, at a moderate pace.4.5 Unexpected obstacles
4.5.1 Testing all skaters in a pack of 4-10 moving at a moderate pace. All skaters demonstrate the ability to perform safe knee taps and slides at unexpected times in the pack. Pack skaters must avoid the downed skater(s) without going out of bounds, falling over them or causing unnecessary hazard.
4.5.2 Demonstrates the ability to recover balance after bumping skates or locking wheels with another skater.
Skater must demonstrate the ability to perform the following skills without fouling other skaters while skating at a moderate pace.5.1 Taking hits
5.1.1 Responds safely to repeated heavy blocks without flailing or grabbing other skaters. If the hit knocks the skater off balance, they fall safely, without sprawling, and demonstrate an ability to recover within 2 to 4 seconds.
5.1.2 Demonstrates the above in a pack situation, without causing an unnecessary hazard for pack skaters.5.2 Positional blocking and leaning (aka frontal blocking or stall blocking)
5.2.1 Performs contact with good posture and without loss of balance.
5.2.2 Demonstrates ability to lean and push on an opponent with legal blocking zones to legal target zones while moving at moderate pack speed.
5.2.3 Demonstrate ability to plow stop in a pack without tripping other skaters in the pack.
5.2.4 Demonstrate ability to use a plow stop to slow another skater.
5.2.4.1 Must be no more than 2 feet (0.5 meters) in front of other skater.
5.2.4.2 Other skater must have demonstrated decrease in pace due to blocking skater’s positioning and/or contact.5.3 Checks
5.3.1 Demonstrates the ability to perform repetitive hip and body checks delivered with legal blocking zones to legal target zones with moderate to heavy force while skating at a brisk pace.Pace
Brisk pace is greater than 5 laps per minute.
Moderate pace is 3-5 laps per minute.
Without breaking stride
A skater starts by striding in one direction and, using the same rhythm as established skating stride, executes a transition and/or recovery tactic and continues skating at prior established stride without a noticeable change in pace or rhythm.
Those are the Minimum. MINIMUM! You still have to get yourself the necessary gear, be competitive (to make the squad) AND be able to practice several times a week. And you thought Derby women were tough? They are beyond tough.. add in dedicated and committed.
So you’re interested and still reading.. great!
Here is a recap of the last bout!
Also a couple videos I took this past weekend. (Forgive the camera-phone video work)
Even if you can’t join in and be an athlete, you can always be an athletic supporter! Home bouts are listed on the LVRG Webpage and are held at the Independence Family Fun Center in Schnecksville!
Filed under LV Roller Girls
NoiseCast – Episode 5 – Lehigh Valley Pro Sports with kraM & Dan!
Episode 5 of the NoiseCast is so hot the tape recorder melted! Luckily we had digital backup!
Join host Kram209 along with our very own Editor Dan live at The Black Forest Deli as they discuss some Nation Award News, LV Steelhawks, LV Roller Girls, Valley Cycling, LV Phantoms, of course some IronPigs, and much more!
[audio http://www.dccvoip.com/audio/NoiseCast_Episode_5.mp3]
Right click (download) – click for mobile
Let’s Go Blanco!! Suomi the Money!
DiPro
(was on the A/V team)
LV Roller Girls Upset Mother State
Our Lehigh Valley Rollergirls Hissy Fit squad came into this bout a 70% underdog. Mother State came in with a reputation for destroying opponents.
With only 7 skaters on the squad, Mother State was all business showing impressive skills warming up and a solid game plan. Their blocking was great, their jammers were quick and fast but they revealed their weakness early in the bout. Penalties. The best of plans fall apart when that first shot is fired and when the Hissy Fits realized Mother State’s game plan was only effective with all skaters on the rink they quickly took advantage of it.
The Hissy Fits got off to a great start pushing an early 25-0 lead only to have the score tied following a powerful power jam by Mother State. Mother State kept the momentum rolling until the Hissy Fits charged forward to a 96-83 halftime lead.
After the break it became a nailbiter. With 15 minutes remaining the score was tied at 138. With 6 minutes to go it was tied at 163. At 4:00 minutes tied at 168. The fans were screaming, they were yelling they were chanting. With less than 2 minutes to go the Hissy Fits got a huge break gaining a powerjam that pushed them to 192 with Mother State at 168. There were 3 more exciting jams that ended with a final LVRG powerjam and ultimately a victory!
Final Score: Mother State 183 – LVRG Hissy Fits 195
I have to say both squads fought hard in an almost brutally physical bout tonight. Playing short handed (I heard 7 is all they normally need) Mother State was impressive. Teamwork and well thought out, perfectly timed and effective strategy kept this bout exciting.
Filed under LV Roller Girls
Roller Derby Challenge!
The Lehigh Valley Rollergirls have issued a challenge!

That’s right! Can’t skate? No problem.. it’ll be like your mom’s freshly waxed kitchen floor. Have some derby fun Risky Business style!
For more details check out the LVRG Website!
Filed under LV Roller Girls
Catching Up 3-11-13
Spring training is in full swing but I’m going to let Decal, Kram and Dipro handle that for now. Really interesting comment from Decal regarding the bench clearing incident when Canada faced Mexico recently:
Maybe we could also arrange a Canada/Mexico rematch at Coca-Cola Park. There were no less than 10 past, present or future Ironpigs involved in the big brawl at the World Baseball Classic on Saturday. Pete Orr and 2012 Reading LHP Jay Johnson were ejected. Others on the Canadian roster were Phillippe Aumont, Scott Mathieson, R.J. Swindle, John Suomi, &Tyson Gillies while team Mexico was represented by Rodrigo Lopez, Oscar Villarreal and Sebastian Valle who was behind the plate for Mexico when the bean ball incident took place.
Also included was some video:
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With that said Friday was the Steelhawk’s first game of the 2013 season as well their first game in the new league. (PIFL) I have to say I am disappointed in the results. These guys have been working hard, I know this. I’ve seen it. Great folks in a great organization. They ended up losing on a last minute trick play to the Alabama Hammers. Despite the incredibly poor video (without audio) and the radio station play by play announcers on a separate web link calling our team the SteelDogs for the first three quarters (I gave him a break as he sounded like Charlie Manuel) I have to say I feel let down. Almost, almost upset about this loss. The Steelhawks dominated in this game only to have multiple penalties, mistakes and missed kicks to deflate their efforts. I don’t want you to think I’m trying to put down my team, but I don’t want it to be known that I was happy. If I don’t care about a team and its players I usually shake off a loss and give out compliments regardless. If I love the team, the players and staff… I care. I care a lot. I want them to succeed. The Steelhawk’s home opener is at Stabler Arena this coming Sunday and I will be there with beer and bbq tailgating. If you haven’t had my bbq, show up and try some. Come on out and help us Bring the Noise!
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Come Saturday I found myself at the Independence Family Fun Center in Schnecksville to see our Lehigh Valley Rollergirls take on the Ithaca Suffer Jets. While pre-bout league estimates gave our Hissy Fits a 10% chance of victory, the gals fought hard after a “rink malfunction” delayed the game almost an hour. I nearly had super bowl flashbacks revisiting repeat after repeat of commercials but my attention (as were many others) was focused on the woman who was remarking the floor in a tight dress and high heels. I’ll let you use your imagination as the photo’s were deemed a bit too provocative for this blog.
Anyways, The Hissy Fits ended up falling to the Suffer Jets and all headed out to Grumpy’s BBQ for food and festivity.
How much do I love the Roller Derby, Let me count the ways….
1. Beautiful, athletic women in tight clothes.
2. Great roller derby names like Helen DeRink, Daisy Destructo, Vanilla Creamher and Levelin Levi.
3. BYO everything. How many sporting events allow you to bring your own beer. (No glass) Cash Money $$$$ savings there!
4. You get to party with them all afterwards at a BBQ place! Free food!
5. An exciting sporting event. Cheers, hard hits, fast action.
What’s not to love?!
That’s all I got for now.
OinK! Screech! Roll On!
Filed under LV Roller Girls, Steel Hawks
Bangathon Part II – Steelhawks Fly High!
Today was a great day for Lehigh Valley sports! The IronPigs won and currently hold the best record in the International League, (while not in the LV) the Philadelphia Union soccer team won today, the Lehigh Valley Steelhawks defeated the Cedar Rapids Titans and our Lehigh Valley Rollergirls fought hard but came up a bit short in the end of what I hear was an exciting bout!
Stay tuned for DiPro’s report on the IronPig’s game.
For details of the Rollergirls bout check out The Corner Seat.
For details of the Steelhawks Bangathon tonight… well keep reading!
Ok, ok.. I know what you’re thinking. I explained this once before but the Steelhawk’s players are calling this season a “Bangathon!”
You could apply that to the Rollergirls as I hear their bout was just about as rough and brutal as the Steelhawk’s Indoor Football game tonight!
Last season Jimmy T names the IronPig’s season the “Magic Carpet Ride” and this season the Steelhawk’s have their “Bangathon” in full force.
The first half ended with a 7-7 tie with both defenses standing tall.
The second half saw a lot more action and after trading scores in the 3rd quarter the Steelhawk’s took control scoring 11 unanswered points in the 4th quarter to take the 25 to 19 victory!
Isiejah Allen brought in two touchdown and Irani DeAraujo caught one. Leading the defense in tackles was Matt Cohen with 9 solo tackles and 2 assists. Marvin Johnson forced a fumble.
Can’t say enough of how well the Steelhawk’s defense held back the Titan’s offense tonight as it spent a long time out on that field.
Keep banging Hawks!
Great day for Lehigh Valley Sports!
OinK! Screech! Roll on!
Filed under LV Roller Girls, Noise Nation-Dan, Steel Hawks
The Season Begins Saturday March 31st!
The Lehigh Valley Rollergirls will open their 2012 season at home this Saturday at 6:00pm.
Come on out and have a great time!
Filed under LV Roller Girls, Noise Nation-Dan







