How Do You Replace The Lead Singer?

“Back in black
I hit the sack
It’s been too long I’m glad to be back”

–AC/DC

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In February, 1980, Bon Scott, the lead singer and voice of the hard rock band AC/DC passed away.  They considered disbanding.  Ultimately, a new lead singer was found (Brian Johnson) and the above lyrics opened side 2 of their best-selling album, Back in Black.

A change in voice can be a big deal.  The wrong choice can alienate fans and doom a project.  Change is never easy.

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It became official today.  It was the news that was rumored throughout the club level late last season:  Tim Cherones, PA announcer since the inauguration of the IronPigs in 2008, would not return for a seventh season in 2014.  We could hardly believe it.  Denial was the most common response to the news.  It was difficult to imagine.  Matt Provence might be “The Voice of the IronPigs,” and rightfully so.  But, Tim is–was–the “Voice of Coca Cola Park.”  It wouldn’t be the same.

We know this.  Tim’s missed a couple games.  Not many.  Few and far between, but it has happened.  The results haven’t been pretty.  In fact, Mrs. Kram has stated that she will not attend an IronPigs game when Tim is not on the PA (…umm, can I get a refund on her seat?…)

Alas, change is inevitable.  The show must go on, and the IronPigs begin their search for Tim’s replacement ( here ).

Here in Kram’s Korner, we’re always ready to help.  We have suggestions:

1. Lindsey Knupp:  I thought she did a great job filling in last year.  She was better than any other substitute for Tim we’d had in the past.  She knows the game.  She knows the script.  The press box is nice and comfy compared to running around on the field all game long.  The downside?  Well, Ed said he won’t ever attend a game with a female PA.  And, we lose Lindsey as the Mistress of Ceremonies on the field (another downgrade, probably).  But Ed will come around–nothing a couple Bloody Marys won’t fix.  And they’ve already had a couple good “on-field” MCs.  Plus, Mrs. Kram approves. Lindsey’s the leader in the clubhouse…
2. Jason DiPro:  DiPro does a pretty nice Bob Sheppard impersonation.  And, if we can get an intern to deliver the Captain to the press box, the price will be right.  For the fans, the possibility that DiPro will become the first International League PA announcer to get ejected from a game will add an extra level of excitement–kinda like waiting for the car wreck at a NASCAR race.  And think of the benefits for recently re-signed shortstop Andres Blanco!     Alas, we’d lose DiPro, the fan.  And I’m not sure he could stay in one location for nine straight innings.  Or goodness, extras…
3. Kram:  I was nominated on Twitter earlier today.  Laughable.  I’ve got a voice for silent film.  Or, possibly, for a sinus medication commercial.  Plus, I’m probably more volatile than DiPro given the right circumstances. Not a good choice.
4. The Field: Here’s my best suggestion:  Let the Fans Decide.  Get the best four to eight candidates and then let the fans vote following the first home-stand.  Think of the pressure on the fans to come out to all the games (despite the April weather) to hear all the choices!  It would be grand.  Think of the publicity!  Think of the pressure on the candidates to perform!  Anything could happen!  Or, we could make it like Survivor and vote one off, and let the others continue until the next home-stand!  We could conduct impromptu between-innings shenanigans to gauge the candidates’ ability to improvise!  It’s a glorious idea!

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All kidding aside, I would like to thank Tim for his years of service.  Just as the radio voice–Matt in this case–is like your friend telling you about the game, Tim was like your host, guiding you through the evening’s activities.  His voice never grew old, despite the silliness of some of the between innings entertainment.  I always felt he was respectful of the game and the players as well–not an easy task given the sometimes carnival atmosphere.  We understand the circumstances though–job responsibilities, family, life…we all live it.  Best wishes, Tim.  You’re welcome back any time.

Seen and not heard,

@Kram209

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PS:

Rock on, Garth…